Adventures in Parenting

Hello! I’m so glad you’re here! 

My hope is these "Adventures in Parenting" posts can be a space for parents to relate, feel encouraged, and sometimes laugh out loud from the ridiculousness that can be parenting.

You’re going to get such a fun glimpse into the lives of two amazing sisters Penny and Lilly.

I have the absolute pleasure of being their mom.

Aside from 9 months in Salt Lake City, Utah Penny and Lilly have lived in the Flathead Valley in Montana their whole lives. This area has a fleeting spring; beautiful summer that is usually interrupted when smoke from wildfires moves in; a long, cloudy fall; and a harsh, snowy winter when temperatures drop and mostly stay under 30 degrees F.

Penny and Lilly are 18 months and 1 day apart. Penny is 7 and very much looking forward to turning 8 in August. Lilly turned 6 in February. We get asked if they’re twins almost every time we are out in public. Which is really funny to me because aside from them being the same height they don’t share many physical characteristics. 

A little bit of our history:

• When Penny was 8 months old I quit my job (as an apartment complex manager) to stay home with her. I started a blog called "Adventures in Staying Home" where I shared all my new mommy thoughts, and sometimes tips and tricks I was learning. One month into staying home I got pregnant with Lilly. Two under two was time-consuming so the blog didn't get much (or any) attention.
• Our family loves hiking, rafting, traveling, and hanging out with friends and family.
• This past school year I homeschooled Penny (2^nd grade) and Lilly (Kindergarten).
• We did the whole living in a travel trailer thang for quite a few months back in 2017/2018.

I want to share a quote from a best friend's mom, Patricia Faustini, who passed away a couple years ago. "Being a remarkable fantastic mother changes peoples lives and to this you are called. Love Patti" Patti wrote this sweet encouragement to me many years ago when I was struggling with being mother. 

Sometimes parenting is overwhelming. Mom guilt is real and can consume me with doubt, fear, and general exhaustion that I'm not good enough. When Patti shared those words it was a sweet reminder that I'm enough. I am remarkable and fantastic even when [fill in the blank]. I am remarkable and fantastic even if [fill in the blank]. 

Sometimes parenting is hilarious. At 5 years old one of the girls said, "I guess my foot didn't get any sleep last night cause it's asleep." Another time she said, "Mom, you should be an octopus. Then you could cook dinner, look at your phone, do the dishes, look in the fridge." One time we were at a restaurant eating outside and a bird flew on a table and started eating the leftover food. Lilly said, "He's such a good helper cleaning that table." I laughed and said, "you are hilarious!" She immediately responded, "I was born to be hilarious!"

Sometimes parenting is just right. Routines are flowing, everyone's getting along, and all is good.

Wherever you're at today, my hope is that you know you are enough. You have everything it takes to be the best parent you can be. 

Love well, 

Nicole 

Creating Quality Family Connections

No one sets out with a plan to neglect building family relationships. Our lives just seem to fill up with all sorts of to-do's and distractions. Sometimes, it even happens to the most intentional of us. 

It is so important to form deep bonds that help us feel safe and secure, but also we need to feel wanted. We need to feel like we're awesome to be around! Sometimes we need to remember to get out of our comfortable routines, mix it up a little, and have some good old-fashion fun together! 

So, what do you say, can you make some time to participate in a connection builder?

FAMILY NIGHT

This is a time for everyone who lives in the home to come together, either around the table or on the couch, and enjoy some quality time together. You can gather weekly or monthly. Play board games or watch a movie. Eat pizza, popcorn, candy, or allow everyone to pick their favorite snack. This should be such a special treat of a night that everyone looks forward to it! The key here is tradition, consistency, and keeping it purely fun!

OUR MOTTO
Is there a phrase or question or affirmation you want to incorporate into your family? Here are a few examples to use, or they might help you create your own. 

"In our family we build each other up. There are plenty of people who will try to tear us down."

"How were you kind today?"
"In our family we not only see the good, but we also do good."
"Whatever we do, we do it to the best of our ability."

When our girls were 2 and 4 we started saying, "kind words, happy heart, gentle hands" to remind us that our words and actions affect others. It’s something we still say to this day. 

PASS THE FAVOR TRINKET

Choose a little item. It can be a key, a rock, a figurine. Start by giving it to the oldest person. They can now ask any other family member to do a favor for them. If the family member does the favor, they get possession of the trinket and can ask a favor of anyone. The intent is learning how great it feels to help others. 

HUG

Hugs have healing power! Hugging lowers blood pressure, heart rate, anxiety, and the stress hormone cortisol. When we hug for more than 8 seconds our body releases oxytocin, which is a hormone that increases bonding and a sense of belonging. Hug it out and physically feel that connection building!

DO UNTO OTHERS

The point is to build self-esteem by saying or doing things that portray to another member of the family "you're special and appreciated."

Everyone chooses someone that for one week they will focus on. It doesn't have to be daily, but during that week you can leave a note on their pillow, buy them their favorite snack or 'that thing' they mentioned they wanted, fold/put away their laundry, draw or paint something for them. Get thoughtful. How can you uniquely show that person they are loved?

READERS ARE LEADERS

There are so many amazing books to read together as a family! 

Simply choose one reader, or take turns reading paragraphs, or chapters.
If you want to get creative and bring the book to life :

Make food mentioned in it. 
Dress up as your favorite character.

Art projects galore.

Buy a toy of a character. 

Act it out.

VISION BOARD

You'll need: 

poster board

markers
magazines/newspapers
scissors

Fill the poster board with words that describe your family, places you love to visit or hope to visit, food you enjoy, things that make you happy, etc. 

ONE-ON-ONE DATES

At least monthly every member of the family should have one-on-one time with each other. 

DINNER HELPER

They get to pick the meal. Set the table. Help make the food they chose. Whomever didn't make the meal cleans up!

YEARLY INVENTORY

Verbalize everything you are thankful for from the past year. 
This can be things you've seen, learned, done, begun, finished, decided, experienced.
And then share what you are looking forward to in the coming year.
 

The people you love are the most important relationships throughout your entire life.

My best advice to you is to try your absolute hardest to pursue connection over and over again with all those you love. 

Love well,

Nicole

Love Languages for Kids

Here are the 5 love languages given by Gary Chapman : 

Words of Affirmation

Acts of Service

Receiving Gifts

Quality Time

Physical Touch

Do you know your child's love language?

Penelope is three and a half and it is extremely noticeable that words of affirmation is her top love language, followed closely by physical touch. Penny can wake up in a sour mood and all it takes are some compliments and a mini back-rub to turn her day around.

Lillian is two and I've caught on that her top love language is physical touch followed by quality time. In Lilly's perfect world we would spend an hour staring into each other's eyes while I hold her in my lap, allowing one of her hands to be on my chest while the other rests on her chest - all in silence of course. 

Children need love, lots and lots of love. 

I think it's very important that children are shown love in a variety of ways. 
But if you can pinpoint how they receive it best, do that love language most!


Words of Affirmation

• compliments
• encouragement
• positive reinforcement
• cautious of speaking in harsh tones

Acts of Service

• doing the tasks they can't do for themselves (when they're older do tasks for them that they have learned to do for themselves, but don't enable laziness)
• helping them practice sports, flash cards for tests, instruments, etc.
• teaching them the importance of serving others
• fix broken toys, sew buttons/tears/rips on clothing

Receiving Gifts

• homemade cards (spend time on a nice picture or words)
• small/inexpensive trinkets
• well thought out large/expensive gifts
• items from nature (rocks, leaves, etc.)

Quality Time

• Go on a one-on-one date
• Read books, make crafts, adventure outside, play
• Put away distractions, get on their level, and just BE with them (for at least a half hour)
• Ask open-ended questions to encourage conversation 

Physical Touch

• hugs
• hand on shoulder
• hold hands
• back/foot/hand rubs

Us parents have the difficult task of shaping and raising future generations.  

 Thankfully, the Beatles make it sound easy when they say, "all you need is love."

They still bring up this "magical adventure meal"
when they got to eat in the window seat
because we sold our dining table.

Love well, friends! 
Love well!

For : the stay-at-home parent

Greetings!

I recently saw someone I hadn't seen in a couple years.
He asked how I've been, what I've been up to, what I do for work?

My response : "I'm just a stay-at-home mom."

Instantly, I cringed at my response.
Just. I am not JUST anything.

I am a pirate, a queen,

and a multitude of other characters.

I am an elephant, a bear,

and countless other animals.

I am a toilet bowl cleaner, cook, 

and a doer of many other household chores. 

I am a supporter, a listener, an ouchie kisser, 

and I possess a mishmash of other qualities. 

Today, as I'm planning out Christmas gifts, I am the best bargain hunter and thrift-scorer! 

I need to give myself more credit for what it is I actually do all day. 

And if I know other stay-at-home parents like I think I do, 

you need to give yourself more credit as well! 

Being a stay-at-home parent is not for the meek.
You are an eclectic mix with an extremely broad resumé.

Embrace your multiple identities!

Be the best you can be! 

Do 'work' you're proud of!

Love. Love well!

And remember, you're not just anything...

Wishing you all the best in your parenting journey,

Nicole

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Being A Parent

Oh, parents! 

May you never forget the moment your child arrived.

When your child is new to you there is this connection that is indescribable! 

You're in "the love bubble."

Penelope Joy

Lillian August

They are perfect. 
They smell so stinking delicious you really do just want to eat them right up! 

Years go on and things change :
Just like with any relationship the excitement, newness, thrill-of-it-all dissipates.

You find yourself realizing :

The infatuation has worn off...with my kid(s)!

But the thing about being a parent : there is no "breaking up." 

You're in it for the long-haul. 

So, what does this really mean?!

You have to start putting in serious work.
You have to choose to love them through it all. 
You have to start being intentional. 

Take a few deep breaths. 

Now, have a dance party! 

Allow your kids to be kids.

Let them get dirty.

Read them their favorite book over & over.

Get on their level & explore the magic in everything. 

Give them more hugs. 

Did you know kids give THE BEST hugs?!

Never forget the joy. 
Don't give up.
Love them unconditionally.
Love them well. 

Wishing you all the best in your parenting journey!  

20 Things I Want You To Know & Remember

Dear little love,

I promise to always love you. 

I promise to always welcome you with an open heart & arms. 

I am beyond blessed that God gifted me with you.

I am here to help guide you in creating a wonderful life...

20 things I want you to know & remember. 

1. Love God. Above all else, pursue relationship with Jesus. Every day should start with, "Hello, Jesus!" and end with "Goodnight, God!" Pray without ceasing.
2. Go on adventures; no matter how big or small. 
3. Be a great friend.
4. Create. Play. Draw. Paint. 
5. Read something every day.
6. Get outside as much as possible. Breathe in the fresh air. Explore the outdoors. 
Skip. Jump. Run. Climb. 
7. Ooze positivity. You & those around you will benefit greatly.  
8. Accept others for who they are. 
9. Exude the fruit of The Spirit : love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness & self-control.
10. Keep it simple. 
11. Be confident in who you are.
12. Maintain your health : body, mind & spirit.
13. Love well. Love God, family, friends, acquaintances & strangers. 
14. Laugh often.
15. Enjoy your life. Enjoy the good, bad, ugly & beautiful. 
16. Sometimes all it takes is remembering to "just breathe." 
17. Admit when you're wrong & always apologize if you need to. 
18. Never lose who you are by trying to impress someone else. 
19. Make family a priority.  
20. You are enough. Quit comparing. You were created because this world needed a YOU! We need your stories, passions, experiences, failures & love. This world was meant to exist with you & everything you have to offer. So just be YOU! 

I'll love you forever,

momma

Children's Books

READ!

My mother was a librarian for 14 years of my childhood.

What did this mean for me?

I spent a gazillion hours in the public library thumbing through an assortment of stories.

I was carried away to distant lands. I had fictional friends. I learned & dreamed & explored.

Reading is magical. 

We have so many favorite children's books!
Here are some of our most favorites...

The Jesus Storybook Bible by Sally Lloyd-Jones 

I Love You Through & Through by Bernadette Rossetti 

Giraffe's Cant Dance by Giles Andreae

Llama Llama Nighty Night by Anna Dewdney

Geraldine's Big Snow by Holly Keller
A Porcupine Named Fluffy by Helen Lester
Panda-monium! by Cynthia Platt
The Mitten by Jan Brett
The Twelve Dancing Princesses by Marianna Mayer
Duck & Goose Find a Pumpkin by Tad Hills
God Knows All About Me by Kate Toms
Are You A Cow? by Sandra Boynton
Ten Little Ladybugs by Melanie Gerth
Witzy's Fun Bath by Katie Kobble
P-O-T-T-Y by Kathy Ireland

I encourage you to read to your children! 

Open up new world's for them.

Create a special bond through reading together. 

I promise you, your child(ren) won't be the only one benefiting! 

Enjoy!

Nicole

Poop Explosions!

Oh my gosh you guys! I WISH someone would have shown me this trick earlier!!!!
So Penelope had three poop explosions that I can remember. When I say poop explosion I mean up the back, down the legs, up the front..you get it. With all three of those I seriously struggled to not get poop all over (even more so than it already was). I would pull her onesie off and as it was going up over her head it definitely smeared in her hair, once on her face, just EVERYWHERE!
So now with Lillian, I'm like, "hey..pro here." NOPE! And let me tell you, I don't know if we've made it three days without an explosion from this little one. It's not the diaper size (I've tried switching). So with all these explosions I was losing my mind! We're talking bath after bath, up to five in one day. So one night I'm scrolling through Pinterest and there it is : my godsend! Thank you Jesus for the person who figured this out! May this help you, whoever you are changing newborn poop explosions!

They created onesies with that fold-over flap so you can pull it DOWN over their arms, and down their body so NO MORE POOP IN THEIR HAIR (or on their face)!!! I just can't tell you how much I appreciated seeing this and now a poop explosion ain't no thang!

I hope that this helps at least one person as much as it has helped me!