It is so important to form deep bonds that help us feel safe and secure, but also we need to feel wanted. We need to feel like we're awesome to be around! Sometimes we need to remember to get out of our comfortable routines, mix it up a little, and have some good old-fashion fun together!
So, what do you say, can you make some time to participate in a connection builder?
FAMILY NIGHT
This is a time for everyone who lives in the home to come together, either around the table or on the couch, and enjoy some quality time together. You can gather weekly or monthly. Play board games or watch a movie. Eat pizza, popcorn, candy, or allow everyone to pick their favorite snack. This should be such a special treat of a night that everyone looks forward to it! The key here is tradition, consistency, and keeping it purely fun!
OUR MOTTO
Is there a phrase or question or affirmation you want to incorporate into your family? Here are a few examples to use, or they might help you create your own.
Is there a phrase or question or affirmation you want to incorporate into your family? Here are a few examples to use, or they might help you create your own.
"In our family we build each other up. There are plenty of people who will try to tear us down."
"How were you kind today?"
"In our family we not only see the good, but we also do good."
"Whatever we do, we do it to the best of our ability."
"In our family we not only see the good, but we also do good."
"Whatever we do, we do it to the best of our ability."
When our girls were 2 and 4 we started saying, "kind words, happy heart, gentle hands" to remind us that our words and actions affect others. It’s something we still say to this day.
PASS THE FAVOR TRINKET
Choose a little item. It can be a key, a rock, a figurine. Start by giving it to the oldest person. They can now ask any other family member to do a favor for them. If the family member does the favor, they get possession of the trinket and can ask a favor of anyone. The intent is learning how great it feels to help others. 
HUG
Hugs have healing power! Hugging lowers blood pressure, heart rate, anxiety, and the stress hormone cortisol. When we hug for more than 8 seconds our body releases oxytocin, which is a hormone that increases bonding and a sense of belonging. Hug it out and physically feel that connection building!
DO UNTO OTHERS
The point is to build self-esteem by saying or doing things that portray to another member of the family "you're special and appreciated."
Everyone chooses someone that for one week they will focus on. It doesn't have to be daily, but during that week you can leave a note on their pillow, buy them their favorite snack or 'that thing' they mentioned they wanted, fold/put away their laundry, draw or paint something for them. Get thoughtful. How can you uniquely show that person they are loved?
READERS ARE LEADERS
There are so many amazing books to read together as a family!
Simply choose one reader, or take turns reading paragraphs, or chapters.
If you want to get creative and bring the book to life :
If you want to get creative and bring the book to life :
Make food mentioned in it.
Dress up as your favorite character.
Dress up as your favorite character.
Art projects galore.
Buy a toy of a character.
Act it out.
VISION BOARD
You'll need:
poster board
markers
magazines/newspapers
scissors
Fill the poster board with words that describe your family, places you love to visit or hope to visit, food you enjoy, things that make you happy, etc.
magazines/newspapers
scissors
Fill the poster board with words that describe your family, places you love to visit or hope to visit, food you enjoy, things that make you happy, etc.
ONE-ON-ONE DATES
At least monthly every member of the family should have one-on-one time with each other.
DINNER HELPER
They get to pick the meal. Set the table. Help make the food they chose. Whomever didn't make the meal cleans up!
YEARLY INVENTORY
Verbalize everything you are thankful for from the past year.
This can be things you've seen, learned, done, begun, finished, decided, experienced.
And then share what you are looking forward to in the coming year.
This can be things you've seen, learned, done, begun, finished, decided, experienced.
And then share what you are looking forward to in the coming year.
The people you love are the most important relationships throughout your entire life.
My best advice to you is to try your absolute hardest to pursue connection over and over again with all those you love.
Love well,
Nicole
